person writing in a journal the words "put yourself out there"

Put Yourself Out There

Hi, It’s me. I’ve been really busy.

Actually I don’t like the excuse “I’ve been busy” but if you go back and sing those lyrics to the tune of Taylor Swift’s Anti-Hero, you’ll notice it works!

Anyway, hello! It’s been some weeks since my last post and lots has happened.

  • I turned 50!
  • Started performing stand up comedy again!
  • Had a minor existential crisis questioning all of my life choices up until this point.

Thank goodness that third one didn’t last long. That was not a fun week for me or my husband!

But, I’m back and over the last few weeks there are 2 insights I want to share today:

First, it’s OK to brag a little

Since stepping back into comedy I’ve attended a handful of open mics AND got invited to perform a 5 minute guest spot in a REAL show! Woo hoo! So, now when people ask me, “What’s new?” I tell them about the comedy show! And most respond with, “How do I learn about it? I want to come!”

Why I’m telling you this. To practice what I preach of course! More importantly, because if you’re like a lot of folks on this newsletter, promoting yourself and your own accomplishments (book, business, podcast, comedy show, etc) is HARD and probably uncomfortable. The truth is, if we don’t tell people our good news how will they know? So, it’s OK to brag a little. When I’m 100% excited AND I know it’s something others might find valuable or entertaining it’s SO MUCH easier to talk about. It’s more like “sharing” than selling or promoting.

Second, if there is something you want to accomplish, putting yourself out there is a must

To support my comedy writing I’m now looking for a comedy buddy. Someone also working to improve and perform their jokes. I joined a Facebook group for comics, wrote up a short blurb, and after a week of overthinking it because I was so afraid no one would want to be my buddy, posted my request. Guess what? 3 people responded and I’m talking with all of them this week. (I’ve already talked with one person and we have a lot in common!)

Learning to put myself out there has taken a lot of work. While I’ve gotten better, I still have a voice in my head shouting at me to “stay safe”. However, the benefits of getting out of my own way are so much more than staying safe.

Why I’m telling you this. People aren’t mind readers. Putting yourself out there and making the ask is a must to get what you want. Desire must be strong whether looking for a buddy, people to buy your book, attend your event or come to your show.

The bottom line

There’s more, but I’ll leave it here for now. The bottom line with all of this: when we have the courage and support to let go of beliefs, behaviors and expectations that weigh us down we can feel lighter, more in control and more confident putting ourselves and our work out there. 

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m no Taylor Swift but I do have a comedy show to prepare for!

Your turn to talk to me:

  • Taylor Swift – love her or not? Going to the shows in Foxboro this weekend?
  • What’s exciting you right now that you want to brag about? 
  • What support do you need to make it happen?

Leave a comment and let me know!

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About the blog

Humor, stories, and insights, delivered 2x per month, to perform without the pressure.

Topics include mental health, work, human connection, creativity and more.


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