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2. Feel Good Living is…Car Dancing!
3. Feel Good Friday: Neck and Shoulder Stretch Break
4. Local Feel Good Living: Massage Therapist Jaime Fencer (review)
5. Local Feel Good Living: Alzheimer’s Partnership of the South Shore

Note: The Stretch Break! series is designed for the average healthy adult. Please always consult a physician before starting any exercise/movement program. If you have back, wrist or shoulder pain/injury these stretches may not be right for you. If you are unsure, please check with your doctor before participating in these exercises.

Enjoy!

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4. Feel Good Friday: Neck and Shoulder Stretch Break
5. 10 No Cost Ways to Relieve Stress from Your Desk

I answered without hesitation and share that response in the video.  I also ask you to share your highlight, proudest accomplishment or success for 2009.  Leave a comment and we can all celebrate those moments together.

As 2009 comes to a close (WOW!) take a moment to think about 2009 and always make time to celebrate the baby steps.

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1. Reflections

Have you thought about what 2009 has meant for you?

Before you rush off hoping that 2010 will be “better” take some time to reflect on all that happened for you in 2009.  Perhaps you saw all of your dreams come to life, or maybe you didn’t.  Take some time to think about the events that took place but also consider the role you played in the outcome.  Whatever the case may be, learn from those experiences to create a plan for a richer life in 2010.

Today I leave you with the challenge of self-reflection.  Spend just enough time to appreciate what you have accomplished, and create a plan for moving forward in 2010.

Questions to ponder during your reflection:

• How did you take care of yourself? Taking care of yourself physically, emotionally and spiritually is necessary for feeling good. The more you take care of your needs, the more you will have to offer others.
• What goals did you accomplish? Writing down your goals is one way to make your thoughts and desires real. Plus it’s fun to go back and read what you wrote and then say “Wow, that really happened!”
• How did you celebrate your successes? No matter how big or small your accomplishments, be sure to celebrate each one.  Recognizing your accomplishments will not only keep you motivated, it will keep the momentum going as well.
• How did you grow personally and professionally? Even as adults, we grow and evolve.  Challenge yourself, learn something about yourself, and realize what you are capable of achieving the goals that are important to you.
• Which areas of your life could be richer? Concentrating on what you want rather than what you don’t want is the best way to focus your energy.  When you focus on what you don’t want, you are actually attracting that which you don’t want.  For example, instead of saying, “No more debt in 2010”, focus on saying, “Make more money in 2010”.

Once you’ve gone through this exercise of reflection you can start to think about all that you want out of 2010.  Write it down and make it real. I’m in the process of doing this and will share my accomplishments and plans for 2010 soon.

What is in store for you in 2010?  What can you celebrate from 2009?  Share below and we’ll all celebrate together!

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Having never auditioned for anything before, I was, in a word, nervous.  Fearful thoughts like – “You’re not good enough.”  “What are you thinking!” “Who do you think you are?”  – ran through my mind.  And at the same time I remained cool.   Ever since I started hosting and producing my community TV show in 2007 I knew I wanted this.

While I didn’t get a call back (I would be lying if I said I wasn’t a little disappointed) I had the time of my life, and learned, as always, an incredible amount as a result:

Support, Support, Support! I will say this until I die. Thank you to all the people who supported me in this adventure.  Creating positive support systems is critical when going for a dream.

“This is where I’m supposed to be.” As soon as I finished the audition I said to my friend, “That was awesome! When can I do it again?  This is where I’m supposed to be!”  I typically make decisions based on what I don’t want.  On this particular day, I became pretty clear about what I do want.  Taking action towards your dreams helps create clarity about your path.

Building confidence and competence. As a result of taking this step I now know what I’m capable of achieving and what I need to improve.  My confidence was boosted considerably when one of the judges asked me, “Have we ever done a segment about you on the Rhode Show?”  “No” I responded. “Well we should!”  Now that was “feel good” living.  The best way to build competence and confidence is to take action.  What action can you take to build that confidence, regardless of the outcome?

Enjoy the ride.  I fully understand the meaning of “enjoy the ride”.  The ride is where the fun, excitement and stories come from.  I left thinking “Maybe I don’t really want the gig, I just want the excitement of going for it!” I happen to be an adrenaline junkie.  If you find yourself feeling impatient, or simply wanting to reach that final destination, remember getting there really is a big part of the fun!

There is no failing when you go for it. I didn’t get a call back and I cannot consider that a failure.  I learned an incredible amount about about my skills and my character. I know what I will improve for the future, and it re-ignited a fire in my belly.  If you want something in this world, you can’t stay home and dream.  Eventually you have to get off the couch and go for it – again and again and again.

Thanks to this experience, I’ll be re-launching my TV show, Back to Your Senses, as a weekly online segment right here on this blog starting in January.  Filming begins next week and I’m excited about the new direction and even more excited to bring it to a wider audience.

I also have a new mantra for 2010:

There is no failing when you go for it.

What are you going for in 2010?  What support do you need to help get you there?  Seek it out, create a plan and make it happen.  Share your dreams below and we can all help each other take the necessary steps to get there.

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Because I haven’t always been happy at work.

WORK UNHAPPINESS…THE SHORT VERSION
For most of the 10 years I worked as a market research professional, I experienced work unhappiness.  Work is boring; the pay isn’t enough: complain, complain, complain. In my last job fear and anger took over as I “protected” myself from the environment. I yelled, screamed and even cursed at colleagues. Several years have passed since those days and still I blush with embarrassment at my behavior.  I became so angry during the day I couldn’t take it anymore and with very little preparation, I made the emotional decision to quit the corporate world and start my own business.

Self-employment was the key to my work happiness, right?

Then why, several months later was I still miserable and still complaining?

I began to think something was wrong with me.

That’s when I began to dig deep – to figure out why work made me so unhappy.

VALUES, STRENGTHS AND LIKES
I discovered many reasons for my unhappiness. I also discovered that if I wanted to make a shift I needed to:

• Identifying what I enjoy
• Identifying my strengths (Taking into account feedback from others)
• Identifying my core values

4 values emerged:  Experience, Guide, Fun, Feel Good

Before I identified my values I often used those words/phrases intuitively – referring to myself as a guide and always providing experiences during my talks and of course yoga classes.  And if fun isn’t involved, why bother?  It’s in those moments when I embody all 4 values that I’m at my best.

The funny thing is, these values have always been there. They were hidden under the guise of what I SHOULD do and the belief that in order to make money, work wouldn’t be fun.

I used to day dream about my perfect work environment: A place where people could talk freely and work = laughing a lot and having fun!  In many of my work scenarios today I have that.

For me work happiness wasn’t as simple as choosing happiness.  Identifying my likes, strengths and values has made all the difference in how I approach my work. I needed to go through my own process, heal some old wounds and identify what is important to me.  For a long time I didn’t think I’d ever be happy at work.  With time, patience and a willingness to be open, it became a little easier.

These days when I’m feeling stuck or lacking inspiration I check in with my core values and often find that I’m “out of alignment”.  When I get nervous about presenting in front of a new group I remind myself – guide them through an experience that is fun and feels good!  When I do, my audience has fun and feels good. And I do, too.

What about you?  How do you find work happiness?  Do you struggle?

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I’m often asked “How do I teach other people to manage their stress, too?” Yes, it’s frustrating when you are trying and your colleagues are not. Do not give in to their attitudes! Lance at the Jungle of Life recently wrote a post about how “one” can make a big difference. Concentrate on relieving YOUR stress and you will manage your health and your career success. If you react in a way that is healthy and appropriate, your colleagues may start to notice in their own time. You cannot help those who are not ready for help, but you can inspire through your own actions. Act appropriately and maybe that colleague will come to you and ask “How do you stay so positive during such a frustrating situation?” Now, you can share your knowledge.

Below are no cost ways to relieve stress right from your desk or workspace. You are your greatest asset when it comes to your personal and professional success. You cannot afford not to take a short break and dedicate some time each day, even at work, to your well-being.

• Laugh. Studies prove that smiling and laughing help relax the body, and takes less energy than furrowing the brow. Find a colleague who can provide you with a chuckle or two.
• Breathe – You’ve heard the expression “Just take a deep breath”. Well, there is a lot of truth to that statement, as long as you breathe correctly. Inhaling and exhaling through the nose can be very calming, while inhaling through the nose and out through the mouth can be cleansing. Make the breath long and slow.
• Take a walk – Get away from the problem. Ideally take a walk outside and get some fresh air. At the very least move away from your desk and get a change of scenery. This will help you approach the issue with a fresh perspective when you return.
• Keep your office space clean –A cluttered desk and office can often lead to unnecessary stress or a cluttered mind. Take a few minutes each day to clean up papers and files that have been piling up. Organize books on your shelves, and keep your desk dust free.
• Stretch – If you sit behind a desk and computer all day, chances are your back, shoulders and hips are compressed. Every 30 minutes do a brief stretch to relieve that muscle tension and give you a clear mind.
• Listen – You are not the only one with something to say in the office. If you want to be heard and respected when you speak, you must treat your colleagues with that same respect and avoid interrupting. You may not agree, but you also don’t have to attack. We are all entitled to our opinions.
• Communicate clearly – More and more I find that communication, or lack thereof, is often at the core of stressful situations. Learn how to use your words in a way that gets your message across accurately, intelligently and respectfully. Watch your body language, too. Clear communication ensures you are heard and helps avoid further frustration and confusion.
• Use a vacation day – According to a 2007 International Vacation Deprivation Study by Expedia, 35% of US adults do not use all the vacation time allotted to them in a year. Taking a break, even for a day, helps clear your mind, release tension and provide you the energy you need to be productive when you’re back in the office.
• Stop Complaining. Remember you have choices. If you are unhappy in your current work situation you can have more effective conversations, you can choose to take deep breaths and simply get the work done, or you can create an exit plan. When you complain you are choosing the negativity. I spent many years as a “corporate complainer” serving only to escalate my stress levels. Stop complaining and start making more appropriate choices for you and you’ll notice your stress levels decrease, too.
• Hang a “Do Not Disturb Sign” – Office life is full of interruptions including meetings, phone calls and co-workers looking to chat. Set boundaries, like hanging a do not disturb sign or muting your phone, and stick to them. Give yourself some time during the workday that is uninterrupted so you can get some work done!

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I have no desire to move mountains, construct monuments, or leave behind in my wake material evidence of my existence.  But in the final recollection, if the essence of my being has caused a smile to have appeared upon your face or a touch of joy within your heart…then in living-I have made my mark. – Thomas L. Odem, Jr., Writer and Author

I used to rise and shine on Monday morning with a growl and a grimace; not much shine at all.  Then I read The Monk Who Sold His Ferrari, a spiritual fable about a very successful attorney who suffers a heart attack in the courtroom. Once released from the hospital he sells everything (including his Ferrari!) and moves to India/Bangladesh to become a monk and find a simpler life.  I read this at a time when my job was sucking the life out of me, or rather I chose that.  I don’t remember the exact passage of the book, but something I read prompted me to start waking earlier in the morning. What a difference that earlier wake time made – my productivity, at work and at home, increased and my whole attitude changed for the better.

There are a variety of choices we can make to have a more positive and satisfying Monday. Below are 12 choices I make to stay positive on a Monday morning and throughout the day.

Got 2 feet on the floor? Thank whoever you need to thank for giving you another change at greatness today.  Then promise to make the best of it.

Smile at the first person you see. Even if you smile at your reflection in the mirror.

Give someone you love a hug. Live alone?  Wrap your arms around yourself.  Who knows, maybe you’ll find a smile creep on your face because of the absurdity.  I say that is a win-win!

Sit and eat breakfast.  No skipping and no grabbing a cereal bar for the road.  10 minutes is all you need to eat a bowl of cereal.

Take 5 quiet minutes for you. Wake earlier, tell the family you need this to be there for them.

Write down no more than 3 goals that you want to accomplish today.  Make them manageable and realistic!

Stay in the shower a few extra minutes.

After you get dressed, take a look in the mirror and say to yourself “Damn I look good today!” Then strut your bad self out the door, a smile shining bright on your face.

Take a walk. I love to walk first thing in the morning.  Not necessarily for power, but for fresh air, oxygen and energy.

Morning stretch. Do you sleep curled up in a ball?  Then stretch first thing in the morning to lengthen and relax those muscles.  Focus on the spine, hips, neck and shoulders.  Moderate back bends will energize you.

Rushing out the door anyway? Notice that and pause.  Take a moment to appreciate the family who loves you, your ability to get out the door, the roof over your head.  You’re already ahead of the game.

As you walk out the door, believe today is a good day.

How do you keep a positive attitude on a Monday or any day of the week?

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My heart pounded and sweat dripped down my face.  “I can’t go anymore,” I told myself as I pressed my body closer to the wall, my fingers sliding off the slim hand holds.  “I’ve got you!” Michael yelled 50 feet below.  I looked down.  Big mistake.  I looked up, only 15 feet to go.  You’ve done it before, Stacey, you can do it now!  My eyes stared straight into a broken handhold.  The hold that I naturally wanted to grab based on my positioning.  Stressed and frustrated my heart pounded faster. “I can’t I have to come down, there is no where for me to go. I’m losing strength!” my mind kept chanting.

“Take your time, I’ve got you!” I heard that supportive voice again from below.

Shallow breaths, heart pounding, sweat increasing. I can’t.  I can. I can’t. I can. I can’t.

PAUSE.

I CAN AND I DID.  I reached the top of the wall, hit the final hand hold and yelled, “Coming down!”  A giant smile on my face. I didn’t give up.

WHAT HAPPENED UP ON THAT ROCK WALL?

I didn’t give in to my mind, knowing that physically my body would take me where I needed to go.  I credit my yoga practice for that belief. I learned over the years that my body is stronger than I think and that my mind is often first to give up, especially when faced with physically or mentally challenging situations.  That’s what I love most about teaching yoga and other mind/body connecting practices: helping people over come roadblocks by building not only physical strength but mental strength as well.  Helping people connect in to the strength in their body and their mind.

Every experience is an opportunity for me to practice overcoming roadblocks.  My knowledge of yoga helped me get through the rock gym roadblock.  I will use the memory of this rock gym experience to help me overcome the next roadblock.  Do you see how that works?  We must have practices in place so that when faced with a real life situation we are equipped to handle it.  Without my practices I would not have the strength physically or mentally to get to the top of the rock wall, enjoy nurturing relationships or a successful career.

The next time you hit a roadblock on an otherwise smooth road, consider the following before you let your mind take over and give up.

Remember to breathe. It’s basic, it’s simple, it’s necessary and it works.  Check in with your breath, no matter the situation and see what you can do to slow it down. Tension releases allowing your body and mind to slow down, providing the mental clarity you need to proceed toward your goal.

Check in with your body. The mind and body are not separate, they are fueled by one another.   Yet too often we let our mind take over, disregarding the strength we have in our hearts and our bodies.   When they are both relaxed, wonderful things can happen. When they are disconnected, well, we give up. The next time you notice your mind racing with thoughts, pause from thought and check in with your body.  Is your body really ready to give up or is your mind is talking smack.  If your mind is talking smack, tell it to shut up for a bit. Your physical body is stronger than you think.

What’s the rush? Climbing a rock wall 65 feet up is challenging and tiring both physically and mentally.  Perhaps the broken handhold was my signal to slow down in order to achieve success.  Next time you’re faced with a roadblock, avoid frustration and take heed, maybe it’s time for a short rest.  Take time to enjoy the process, not just the destination.  The challenges make you stronger.

Re-assess the course. My climb was smooth until I got to that broken handhold. By taking a moment to pause, look at my current location and then look around for options, I was able to re-position myself for success.  In this case I took a few steps down before I continued up the wall.  I needed a new position in order to achieve success.   Don’t get locked into your course, remain flexible.

Don’t go it alone. Support is critical in anything that you do.  I was not on this rock wall alone.   Michael provided support by belaying me.  I needed to hear the occasional, “I’ve got you.” and “There is no rush, take your time”.  I felt safe and supported – two keys to success.   With his support I was free of fear.

Have you ever hit a roadblock in your life and been quick to give up?    What practices do you have in place to help you overcome those roadblocks?

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