Let it Flow

WHAT IS BALANCE?
When I look at the phrase work/life balance I see a separation of “work” from “life”. To me LIFE is the big umbrella, work happens to fall under it. Family, home life, personal interests are all part of my life umbrella. Work is not separate from those other things, it is in fact a (big) part of my life.

So then where does this balance issue come from? And what the heck does it mean?

According to dictionary.com, balance has several definitions, the most relevant to this work/life balance issue are:

A state of equilibrium or equipoise

Mental steadiness or emotional stability; habit of calm behavior, judgment, etc.

A NEW WAY OF THINKING
Back in December I attended the Massachusetts Conference for Women in Boston. The lunch keynote discussion included Jack and Suzy Welch. One of the questions they were asked was around the notion of work/life balance. They are parents with high powered jobs, how did they find balance? Jack offered up some food for thought. He suggested this:

There is no such thing as work/life balance. It’s work/life CHOICE.

That caused quite a stir among the 5000 women at the conference, I could hear the hum not only at my table (most of the ladies at my table strongly disagreed!) but in the entire room.

I had an A-HA moment and physical response to this comment. I thought it made perfect sense. Every day I make a choice on whether to work, play, sleep, etc. And if I’m OK with those choices, then won’t I have balance? Won’t I have that mental steadiness and calm behavior as suggested by the definition above? Externally, this may be hard to swallow. Intuitively, I believe this to be very true.

For me, balance is not about taking my 24 hour day and splitting it equally between sleep, work, play, eating, etc. It really is about what Jack suggests - making work/life choices - without judgment. As he told the crowd - he chose work. These days, I too, choose work.

CHOICES
We all have choices. And even if you are reading this saying “no, my boss makes me come in to work at 8am,” think again. You could come in at 8:30 (to consequences, sure, but still you do have a choice!). You could also choose to leave the job and find something that better suits your values. What? I can leave my job?

We all have choices, and I was just introduced to this concept myself about 6 years ago. I, too, went through life thinking I had none. What a surprising and liberating feeling to learn that I did. It made quitting my corporate job easier, because I no longer felt trapped. Knowing I have a choice is a very powerful tool.

FINAL THOUGHTS
As you continue through your day, week, month notice if you feel like you need more balance - are you working too hard? Not spending enough time on you? Running around “crazy” all the time? (I will blog about the use of the word crazy in another post at a later date).

I choose work these days. Admittedly, though, I love what I do so it doesn’t really feel like work. Nonetheless, I CHOSE this. And because it’s my own business I’m developing, it can be stressful. It was not an easy thing to do, to leave a high paying corporate job for an unknown entity. I struggle and work through the challenges everyday. But now, as I think about it, I really do have balance, even though most of my day is spent working. I feel calm (most of the time!), steady and without judgment of myself for what I’ve chosen. I chose something that makes me happy.

And isn’t that really what balance is all about? Isn’t that what LIFE is all about?

Perhaps, to Jack’s credit, it is time to stop thinking about balance as equal parts and start thinking of it as choices. Then, be ok with those choices. If you are not ok with them, maybe it’s time to start making new choices.

What are your thoughts on work/life balance? How do you find balance? Let’s learn from each other - Share your methods below in the comment field.

Tags: Food for thought, Stress //