Food For Thought Friday: Relaxed is Who You Are

by Stacey Shipman on July 30, 2010

Tension is who you think you should be.  Relaxation is who you are.  ~Chinese Proverb

I came across this quote a few years ago and I haven’t been able to forget it.  I first read it at a time when presenting stress management programs was new for me.  I received good feedback from participants, but I never felt completely satisfied.

After reading this quote, I immediately recognized the disconnect. When I presented I acted as I thought I “should” (professional, corporate) rather than who I really am – (more relaxed, casual). Once I recognized that difference I made a conscious effort to become more relaxed as a presenter.

Tension is who you think you should be.  Relaxation is who you are.

In a day and age where being “authentic” is all the rage, this proverb speaks volumes about what that really means.  If you want to be “you”, relax!

When I’m tense I am:

  • Easily frustrated and irritated
  • Short tempered
  • Defensive
  • Sometimes withdrawn
  • Not very likable

When I’m relaxed I am

  • Compassionate and open-minded
  • Patient
  • Kind
  • Action oriented

When I’m relaxed I feel good.  I am confident, happy and satisfied.  When I’m tense I constantly seek change.

Tension is who you think you should be.  Relaxation is who you are.

Awareness is the first step to becoming more relaxed in your life.  And by relaxed it’s not about being lazy.  It’s about letting go of tension, appreciating each moment, or finding the tools you need to cope effectively with various situations.

A great way to feel more relaxed is to use the guided relaxation exercise I posted earlier this week.  Or find an activity you enjoy doing, that takes your mind off things and truly lets you be you.  You know you’re there because you fail to think of anything else!  A few minutes is all you need to restore your original settings and be who you really are.

Do you know who you are when you’re relaxed?

Do you know who you are when you are tense?

Which one feels better?

Have a great weekend!

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Chronic Neck or Shoulder Tension? Or just want to feel more relaxed?

by Stacey Shipman on July 28, 2010

After receiving positive feedback from participants in a recent stress relief and relaxation workshop I presented, I thought I share an audio version of the exercise here. One of the participants told me about her chronic neck and shoulder tension and that after the exercise she “felt and heard a muscle release just like at the chiropractors. Felt Good.” This isn’t the first time this exercise has healed pain from muscle tension.  Hearing news like this is what makes my job worthwhile.

Knowing that these ladies are not alone, I thought I’d share the audio version of the relaxation exercise here, with the hope that it might help you or someone you know.  Whether you have a medical issue or you just want to feel more relaxed, this muscle relaxation exercise will help. Additional benefits include:

  • Improved focus and ability to “get things done”
  • Greater presence
  • Less muscle tension everywhere
  • General sense of feeling relaxed.

The exercise lasts about 12 minutes.  It starts with a guided relaxation (by me) then a minute or so on your own before you hear my voice again.  If you know someone who might benefit, feel free to pass this along. It’s simple, requires no special equipment, money and very little time to get such tremendous benefits.

You deserve a short break to regroup and re-energize before you speed up again.  I hope you give yourself the opportunity to experience it.  Enjoy!

To download and listen later: click the link below “Download audio file” and when the new window opens go to File/Save Page As. Then you can access the audio mp3 from your computer whenever you need or want to!

 

Download Audio File

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Have You Stretched Yourself Lately?

July 22, 2010

When was the last time you stretched yourself?  Went beyond the boundaries of your “comfort zone”, into a place that may scare you, even a little bit?  Do you avoid that growth or embrace it? Last weekend I participated in the Falmouth Triathlon, a sprint distance race that includes a 3/10 mile swim, 9.25 mile [...]

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Stressed at Work? A Few Tips to Help You Out

July 13, 2010

Tory Johnson, founder of Women for Hire recently wrote a piece for Good Morning America on ABCNews.com called Stressed at Work? and of course it caught my attention. She offers some great suggestions including: Keeping a journal to identify how you’re feeling, what triggered you and how your body is responding (stomach ache? Headache? Shoulder [...]

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How to Be More Present & What Matters Most

July 6, 2010

Last week a young mom who attended my stress relief and relaxation workshop asked, “How can I be more present with my kids?” A question I hear more and more. One of the other women, a little older than the first, responded immediately with, “The only thing that matters is spending time with your children.  [...]

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Yoga Resource: Passport to Prana

June 28, 2010

On Sunday I purchased my Passport to Prana, “a multi-studio yoga pass” that allows me to attend yoga classes in the Boston area between now and January 31, 2011 for only $30.  That’s less than $1 per class!  And in a day and age when yoga is becoming both increasing popular and increasingly expensive, this [...]

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TED Talk: Jill Bolte Taylor’s “Stroke of Insight”

June 24, 2010

I recently watched this compelling and touching TED talk by Dr. Jill Bolte Taylor a brain researcher and author of My Stroke Of Insight, (which I just started reading) the story of her stroke and recovery, told and experienced by a brain expert.   Her insight goes far beyond stroke and healing.  She talks about the [...]

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If Stress is a Response, Do you know how you respond?

June 21, 2010

I spoke to a very close friend recently who has been going through a lot emotionally.  She’s also been sick more often than she’d like.  When I asked her whether she thought the illnesses could be stress related, she said, “I don’t think I’m stressed about these things.” I hear that response often when I [...]

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Stretch Break! For your wrists

June 16, 2010

Welcome to the weekly Stretch Break! this week for your wrists.  If you sit at a computer during the day, this is the perfect stretch break for you.  A quick, easy, painless tension release and stretch for your wrists. You don’t even have to leave your chair and it takes about 2 minutes!  Your wrists [...]

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5 Ways to Feel Good About the Food You Eat

June 14, 2010

Today Evita Ochel, a certified holistic nutritionist and biologist, and founder of EvolvingWellness.com, is here to talk about food and how to feel good about what you eat.  If you believe that healthy eating equals deprived eating, Evita says it’s not so!  Keep reading for Evita’s tips on how you can feel good about the [...]

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